10 Things That Annoy Me

These aren't in any particular order.

1. Getting texts when I'm busy. When I'm trying to do something important, the last thing I want to do is to stop what I'm doing, pull out my phone, and text someone back thus initiating a repeating sequence of stopping, texting, and starting again. But if I don't text back, they usually get mad that I didn't. It's a no-win situation.

2. When I text someone, but they don't text back. It hurts my feelings. It makes me think, "What, I'm not important enough for you to take a minute to text back?" Usually while I'm waiting for someone to text back, I start doing something else. Then when I get a text, but it's not the person to whom I had originally sent a text, I get annoyed that they made me stop what I was doing.

3. When I don't know what to do with my eyes when I'm walking the opposite direction of someone in a hallway. You know they're there. They know you're there. But you two don't know each other. You look at them, but you don't want them to think you're staring, so you look away. Then you worry that they'll think you purposely choosing to not acknowledge their existence, so you look back at them. You make eye contact, and both of you quickly look away, desperately wishing that you were somewhere else.

4. When someone leaves a box of cereal in the cupboard when it is practically empty. I mean, seriously. Why couldn't they have just taken the rest of the cereal? What were they thinking? That the no one would mind if there was hardly enough cereal to fill a shot glass with the cereal? I mean, how hard would it have been to pour out the rest into your bowl and throw the box away? This usually ruins my mornings when it happens.

5. Mispronounced words. Particularly when "library" is pronounced "libary" and when "espresso" is pronounce "expresso." Also "pacific" rather than "specific."

6. Blatantly auto-tuned music. If your voice needs to be corrected so much that you sound like a robot in your songs, you shouldn't be singing. Even if it's for stylistic purposes, it sounds stupid.

7. My generation. They're stupid, lazy, and dont no much abowt spelling punctuation or grammer and have a unearned sense of entitlement

8. When I'm trying to tie my shoes, and my kitten tries to make it as difficult as possible. Nearly every time I put on my shoes, the kitten is there. He stalks me around the house in the morning, just waiting for me to put my shoes on. I think it makes his day when he makes mine harder. I try to tie them while he's grabbing them, pouncing on my shoes, and scratching up my hands. Usually once I start on the second one, he's successfully undone the first.

9. How people think tacking "just kidding" onto an insult makes everything all right. Don't look at me like that. Yes, like that. It looks ugly. Oh, that's...what? Oh, that's your normal face? Oops, sorry. You should get something for that. Like surgery...or maybe a paper bag? Just kidding. You look nice, at least in this light. Just kidding. You look bad in all light. Just kidding.

10. The way that apple juice always seems to be in every other fruit juice. It makes me scared to drink any juice. I'm allergic to apple juice. If I drink enough, things happen. Bad things. Horrible things. The kind of horrible where I should only consider drinking it if I'm constipated. And at home. On the toilet. It's not fun when I drink a glass of juice, only to find out it had 25% apple juice so I have to spend the rest of the day terrified that I'll have the dirty squirties at a very inopportune time.